Looking at the trajectory of the ball in the photo above, I am quite certain that this was the most embarrassing kick I ever made. The ball is blurry in the photo. It came off my foot in a hurry. In the time you could blink and take half of a breath, the ball struck the cross bar and came furiously back toward the line of scrimmage with nearly as much force. I had to duck to miss the ball’s return. Needless to say, the fans in the stands enjoyed this Keystone Cop scene; I have never heard a crowd collectively laugh at a football game the way this one did. I get it. The good thing is that we won 33-0 over a Mitchell team that came in about as cocky as any group I have ever seen. This was 1984 and Mitchell’s first football visit to North Harrison. I am certain that some of their players figured we would run out of the locker room and run to the tennis courts by mistake. The best part is we went to Mitchell the next year for North’s first ever sectional game and beat the Yellowjackets on their own turf.

This kick was not without consequence. As I said, we won the game 33-0. I was in a computer programming class during first period that semester. Huge computers and floppy disks that looked like pizza coasters. Our teacher was Mr. Harvey Trowbridge, a high school computer pioneer. Harv also filmed our football games. On the Monday after the game, when I walked into class, Mr. T said, “Well if isn’t the old crossbar kid!” I was not amused. I walked over to his desk, leaned in, and said something I won’t repeat here. I’ll give him credit. He had every reason to send me to Mr. Davis. He didn’t. I think we both made our point and that was that. Mr. T never held it against me. I didn’t hold it against him. More than forty years on, it’s still a good story.

Special Teams. That is the dumbest title ever given to any athletic endeavor. It is worse than calling that little flat ball they use in hockey a “puck”.

When teams punt or try to return the punt, or when a team kicks off and the other team tries to return it, or when a team attempts a field goal or extra point, this phase of the game is called “special teams”. Offense is offense. Simple definition. Defense is defense. Simple definition. Special teams is a terrible name for a phase of the game that is an urgent endeavor that takes skill unlike offense or defense. Urgent, eh? Yes. URGENT TEAMS! That’s the name this phase of the game deserves.

Look, I have been on the football field when it was my responsibility to deliver a punt with my feet doing everything they could not to step backwards on the backline of the end zone. Doing so would be a “safety” and would give your opponent 2 points. Do you think I was out there thinking about what a SPECIAL time that was? No! Urgent. The was an urgent time. Urgent times call for URGENT TEAMS. For the love of mankind, can we not give this phase of the game the moniker it deserves? “Special Teams” does not get it. URGENT TEAMS is much better. Seriously. Call it URGENT TEAMS and maybe you won’t see so many high school kickers happy getting a kickoff to travel inside the 20. No, an urgent kicker wants that ball inside the 5.

The die is cast. The mission is on. The football lexicon that we know needs to come alive and realize the importance of that third phase of the game that goes so very far in deciding a team’s field position. You read it here first. It may take twenty years. It may take seven. But I will rattle every cage and bug enough coaches that sooner or later they will either get their heads out of their butts or they will do what they have to do to shut me up. URGENT TEAMS will one day be a thing. I believe it.

Believe it. Just like I believe the Indiana Hoosiers Football program will have to continue to deal with good old-fashioned Deep South envy and hate. Indiana had nothing to do with Ole Miss getting beat by Kentucky last year. Indiana had nothing to do with Alabama getting beat by Vanderbilt last season. Last year the Indiana Hoosiers beat both of the teams that were in National Championship game the year before. Nobody wants to talk about that. No SEC team can claim that. I know. Geography is everything. Maybe Geography is everything. I read three pre-season magazines with total dedication. Athlon Sports, Lindy’s Sports, and Phil Steele.

What a shock! Lindy’s Sports in published out of BIRMINGHAM, ALABAMA. There is a pattern here.

Lindy’s has picked the INDIANA HOOSIERS to be the 31st best team in the country. THEY HAVE TO. Paul Finebaum might look ill on them if they don’t.

Athlon, published in California, has the INDIANA HOOSIERS to be the 16th best team in the country.

Big Ten Predictions? Lindy’s picks in Indiana to be the 9th best team in the conference.

Athlon picks Indiana to be the 5th best team in the conference.

Get your popcorn ready. As the Indiana Hoosiers of 2025 rack up win after win after win, there will be SEC pundits, see Paul Finebaum, that will do everything they can to poo-poo the teams on Indiana’s schedule. It is the SEC way. I don’t blame them. The SEC TV contract is chasing The BIG TEN. There, I think I said it all.